Pragmatic love involves making sensible relationship choices in finding a partner who will make a good companion and friend. Manic love includes intense feelings for a partner as well as worry about committing to the relationship. You may see yourself in more than one of these styles.Įvidence suggests some people possess a mixture of the three main love styles these mixtures were labelled by Lee as mania, pragma and agape.ĭarling, I love you. People high on storge love are trusting of others and are not needy or dependent on others. Priority is given to having a relationship with a person who has similar interests, affection is openly expressed and there is less emphasis on physical attractiveness. Storge is often regarded as a more mature form of love. It’s not surprising people who endorse this love style are unlikely to commit, feel comfortable ending relationships and often start a new relationship before ending the current one. This style involves being emotionally distant and often involves “game-playing”. This style of love refers to erotic love and is focused on physical attraction and engaging in sex, the quick development of strong and passionate feelings for another and intense intimacy. People high on storge love are trusting and are not needy or dependent on others. These styles include people’s beliefs and attitudes about love and act as a guide for how to approach romantic relationships. First coined by psychologist John Lee, the love styles are eros, ludus and storge. Research has found three primary styles of love. These findings tell us that liking someone is not the same as being in love with someone. Interestingly, these brain regions are not activated when thinking about non-romantic relationships such as friends. These regions release chemicals such as oxytocin, vasopressin and dopamine, which produce feelings of happiness and euphoria that are also linked to sexual arousal and excitement. In fact, the brain regions activated are the same as those activated by cocaine. Love lockdown: the pandemic has put pressure on many relationships, but here's how to tell if yours will survive Neurophysiological studies into romantic love show that people who are in the throes of passionate love experience increased activation in brain regions associated with reward and pleasure. Not only is there an evolutionary foundation to love, love is rooted in biology. Nattakorn_Maneerat/Shutterstock A biological foundation too Love evolved to keep the parents of children together long enough for them to survive and reach sexual maturity. Without love, it’s difficult to see how the human species could have evolved. As offspring rely on adults for many years to survive and to develop the skills and abilities needed for successful living, love is especially important for humans. The period of childhood is much longer for humans than other species. From an evolutionary psychology perspective, love evolved to keep the parents of children together long enough for them to survive and reach sexual maturity. Love is an emotion that keeps people bonded and committed to one another. In contrast, companionate love is typically found to increase over time.Īlthough research finds most romantic relationships consist of both passionate and companionate love, it’s the absence or reductions in companionate love, moreso than passionate love, that can negatively affect the longevity of a romantic relationship. Love by design: when science meets sex, lust, attraction and attachment People have competing responsibilities which affect their energy and limit the opportunities to foster passion. Life events and transitions can also make it challenging to experience passion. Of couples who have been married in excess of ten years, the steepest downturn is most likely to occur over the second decade. Monkey Business Images/ ShutterstockĪlthough a reduction in passionate love is not experienced by all couples, various studies report approximately 20-40% of couples experience this downturn. It’s reductions in companionate love, moreso than passionate love, that can negatively affect the longevity of a romantic relationship.
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